Control Your Destiny Through Your Attitude Follow-up e-Course Welcome -- CYDA (Control Your Destiny Through Your Attitude) Follow-up e-Course Hi, Welcome to the 'How to Control Your Destiny Through Your Attitude' Follow-up e-Course. This special e-course was designed to help you gain the maximum benefits -- and success! -- from "How to Control Your Destiny Through Your Attitude." Each week, you'll receive specific ideas, stories, and inspiration to help you apply each of Joan Gustafson's ten winning strategies for success. So, every week you'll receive invaluable information right in your email box that will help you move forward towards unlimited fulfillment - to help you create your own extraordinary life filled with success! Joan herself has written each lesson. ===== Copyright (c) Lanford Inc. All rights reserved. Lanford and its successors or assigns own all right, title and interest to this publication. CYDA Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #1 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> CYDA - Control Your Destiny Through Your Attitude Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #1 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> Hi, We're really excited to get started... after all, we want to help you create an extraordinary life! As we talked about this e-course, we realized that it would be useful to start with something a bit different. Rather than jump into Joan's success strategies, we thought we'd first give you a bonus. :) The ideas in this lesson come from the course -- and they seemed to us like the perfect way to start. It's an article called: ~~~ 4 Secrets to Keeping Yourself Motivated. We've all been there... We wanted to get started, but for some reason just couldn't. We knew we had to get a job finished, but we just didn't feel the energy... or drive... or something... to get it done. Staying motivated, getting the job done. Nothing could be more crucial to moving forward in life. In fact, the difference between success and not accomplishing what you want is often based on your ability to get and keep yourself motivated. So, how do you change your attitude -- and keep yourself motivated? Here are four secrets: Secret #1. Break It Up. The first step towards getting motivated is to break larger tasks into smaller ones. Nobody enjoys tackling a monster -- it's just too overwhelming. However, it's easy to accomplish small tasks. So, instead of focusing on publishing the book you want to write, set your goal of brainstorming and making a list of what the chapters will be today. The smaller the tasks, the more manageable they seem. Write down on paper the overall plan, and chart out smaller milestones you look forward to passing along the way. Secret #2. Get Started. It almost goes without saying, but isn't said enough. We often tend to overanalyze, worry, postpone, and procrastinate over impending tasks. We wait for motivation to hit us, expecting some magical muse to suddenly shove us off the sofa and on to the task at hand. It doesn't work that way. In fact, most important tasks are accomplished by reversing that formula. Whether you want to or not, set a time to get started, and give yourself a set time block you plan on continuing to work. Maybe just 5 or 10 minutes. Set a stop watch or alarm and get going. Focus on the task as much as you can during that period. For just 10 minutes you're going to focus on the task -- nothing else. More times than not, once your mind resolves itself to the fact that you're going to work anyway, it follows suit by making the most of it. Key point: Motivation usually happens AFTER you've started working, not before. So, create motivation by performing the action. Secret #3. Enjoy The Journey. It's very "American" to look for results. We want to be able to hold up a diploma, show off our new house, or drive our classy car. And it's also the source of a lot of stress -- because often, these results are not even the results YOU care about! So, eliminate striving for the results that other people want. Instead, focus on those YOU want to achieve. Then, enjoy the journey. Life is so much more pleasant when we learn to enjoy the journey. You can't possibly do more than you can possibly do. The fact that you didn't get your masters degree after 24 hours of effort doesn't make you a failure. :) If you've worked hard in the right direction, and you keep on doing it, it's just a matter of time before you'll get wherever you want to go. Savor the victory of overcoming obstacles, get emotionally involved in the process, and learn to appreciate the character, patience, and insight you're developing along the way. Secret #4. Learn To Celebrate. You would think this one would be obvious. But of all the steps involved in getting a job done, it's probably the most neglected. A close relative to Enjoying the Journey, Learning to Celebrate is the process of setting milestones and stopping to acknowledge every victory. Learn to look back at the end of a day and instead of feeling tired and worn out by the hard work, learn to look at the results and feel you've gotten something done. Select larger milestones along the way and reward yourself with tangible, enjoyable perks. For example, once you've stopped smoking for a full month, you're going to buy yourself a new dress with the $92 you saved. Once you get the top of your desk completely cleared off and organized, you're going to give yourself permission to sit around and do nothing (or whatever you want) for an hour. Once you get your bills paid, you'll let yourself take a short nap. Whatever motivates you... Give yourself goals and achievable milestones to aim at and then stop to recognize your successes. It will make you feel much more capable of getting the rest of the task done. Right now, think about how you can apply at least one of these 4 secrets to keeping yourself motivated RIGHT NOW. Then do it. It will make a huge difference. Next week, we'll begin the lessons focused on Joan's Success Strategies. ===== Copyright (c) Lanford Inc. All rights reserved. Lanford and its successors or assigns own all right, title and interest to this publication. CYDA Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #2 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> CYDA - Control Your Destiny Through Your Attitude Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #2 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> Hi, During most of my adult life, I have used ten basic strategies to achieve the success I have had and continue to enjoy. Although each of these strategies, by itself, has contributed significantly to my success, I have found that the integration of the ten strategies is the key to maximizing success, not only in business but also in life. This has also been true of the hundreds of people that I have coached and mentored throughout the years. This e-course will consist of one lesson for each of these strategies. Today, we'll focus on... ~~~ Success Strategy #1: Believe in Yourself! As I mentioned in "How to Control Your Destiny Through Your Attitude," most of the people I coach and mentor are already successful, self-confident people. However, I've found that most people, even those who have high self-esteem, have times when they don't feel as confident as they do at other times. This is usually when they are doing something new where they need to stretch themselves outside of their comfort zone. For those times, I recommend the following: 1. Think of yourself as the important person you are. Each of you is a special human being. Each of you is unique. Each of you has special skills, talents, and abilities that are yours alone. And you can use your special skills, talents, and abilities to increase your own success and also to help others to become more successful. Dr. Dennis Deaton, one of my favorite authors and speakers, teaches that "you alter your destiny by altering your thoughts." How true this has been in my life! The more I think of myself as successful, the more successful I become. Never underestimate the power of thought. (There will be more on this in the next lesson in this e-course.) 2. Practice daily personal affirmations. Many of us have conditioned ourselves in the past to believe that we are less than we are. Our subconscious mind does not think for itself; therefore, it believes whatever is fed into it. If it hears negative comments, it believes them. If it hears positive comments, it believes them. Unfortunately, most of us hear, and pay attention to, many more negative comments than positive ones. That's why positive affirmations are so necessary. All of us need to train and re-train our subconscious mind by assuring it is fed positive thoughts. 3. Emulate self-confident people. Who is it you admire most? Does this person have some characteristics that you would like to emulate? If you decide to emulate some of this person's characteristics, you can be selective in the ones you choose. We can learn much just by observing people who appear to be self-confident. Other ways to learn to emulate characteristics of successful, self-confident people are to talk with them and ask their advice. Most people love to hear that others admire them, and they enjoy sharing their wisdom, experience, and advice. 4. Reward yourself for each success. In a world where we have been raised to be modest and to not "blow our own horns," it is often difficult to accept praise or even to admit that we are successful. However, recognition contributes to self-confidence, and we can't depend on others to give us this recognition. Genuine success comes from within. It is self-generated. It is the realization that we are accomplishing our goals and our mission in life. Each of us measures our own success on our own yardstick. As we do this, we need to generate our own recognition. As we give recognition to ourselves for our accomplishments, we expand our enthusiasm and energy to accomplish more. As we are recognized, our self-confidence grows. Self-confidence builds more self-confidence, which builds more success. As we continue to reward ourselves for our successes, the cycle continues. 5. Surround yourself with positive people. Olympic champion, Wilma Rudolph, was the twentieth of the 22 children in her family. Weak and frail as a child, she contracted pneumonia, scarlet fever, and polio. As a result, her doctors had little hope that she would ever be able to walk. With the encouragement of her mother, Wilma worked at taking one step and then another until, at age eleven, she was able to make it from one side of her yard to the other. When she started high school, she made the basketball team and became one of the starting players when she was a senior. With much hard work, determination, and more encouragement from her mother, she continued to improve her athletic abilities. At the Rome Olympic Games in 1960, she won three gold medals, set world records in both the 100-meter dash and the 200-meter dash, and ran the anchor leg in the four by one hundred-meter relay. She was called the fastest woman on earth. When asked how she had overcome her disability, she responded, "The doctors said I would never walk. My mother said I would. I believed my mother." Not all of us have had the opportunity to live most of our life with positive people, with people who encourage us, with people who do not criticize us. However, as adults, we can choose the people with whom we spend the majority of our time. As you include more positive people in your circle of friends, you yourself will become more positive. As you become more positive, you will attract more positive people. As you attract more positive people into your life, your self-confidence will grow. 6. Look and feel your best. Most people feel better about themselves when they look their best. Following are some tips from successful people on looking and feeling your best: - Wear clothes that are appropriate for the occasion. These clothes do not have to be expensive, but they should fit well and be clean and pressed. - Practice good grooming habits at all times. - Stand and sit straight. - Get enough sleep to look and feel good. - Maintain good health. See your doctor when you are ill, and have regular physical checkups. - Stay physically fit. Aerobic exercises will help, especially walking and swimming. - Wear a smile. You will soon notice that this will help to attract more positive people into your life. The better you look, the better you'll feel about yourself. Most people who practice these simple tips for two weeks begin to notice a difference. As people notice a difference, they make a habit of practicing these tips. As the habits are formed, self-confidence increases. 7. Fake it until you make it. Normally, I would not advise anyone to fake anything. Personal integrity is important to me, and I believe that honesty is critical to one's success. However, what I am recommending here is that you act the part of an extremely self-confident person. By acting self-confident, most people begin to realize that they can be self-confident. If people think of themselves as successful, they are successful. If they believe in themselves, others will also believe in them. The reverse is also true. By demonstrating self-confidence, even when they don't think they have it, they will become more self-confident. 8. Affirm those around you. There are not many people in the world who can't benefit from more self-confidence. I have learned that even the most arrogant and seemingly self-assured people often lack the inner confidence needed to really feel good about themselves. Even these people need compliments. In business, the most confident executives and managers I know are the ones who give credit to their people who do the work. In life, the most confident people are the ones who demonstrate confidence in others. Always remember that you are a special human being! Believe in yourself, and others will believe in you, also. ===== Copyright (c) Lanford Inc. All rights reserved. Lanford and its successors or assigns own all right, title and interest to this publication. CYDA Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #3 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> CYDA - Control Your Destiny Through Your Attitude Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #3 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> Hi, Today's lesson will focus on... ~~~ Success Strategy #2: Dare to Dream Walt Disney said, "If you can dream it, you can do it." I didn't realize how true this was until I learned about visualization. At first, I was skeptical. I considered myself a successful person and didn't think I needed visualization to become more successful. However, I decided to be open-minded and give it a test. The subject of my test was my desire to sell my house and build my dream home. My house had been for sale for several months, and I had received no offers. I had bought a lot on a beautiful pond, and I needed to sell my house in order to start building. I visualized an immediate sale of my home to cash buyers who wanted to close and move in immediately. (If I was going to dream, I was going to dream big!) The following week, I received a cash offer! The buyers wanted to close in nine days and to move in on the day of closing. My first thought was that visualization was almost spooky! My second thought was that this episode was probably a fluke and that it would have happened even without the visualization. As a result, I decided to test visualization more by selecting six additional things I would like to create in my life. My dream creations included material possessions, career advancement, more-fulfilling relationships, and increased spirituality. I described each of these in vivid detail before starting the visualization exercises. Within three months, all six of these dreams came true! Ever since this time, I have been a strong believer in the power of visualization and have used it as the first step in creating all the major "wins" in my life. I understand fully what Henry David Thoreau meant when he said: 'If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with success unexpected in common hours.' In "You'll See It When You Believe It," Dr. Wayne Dyer says, "Your determination to succeed is nothing more than your thought to do so. The idea of success is really the thought of success." In this book, he shared that his thoughts had always created his world. He described his visualization process at age thirteen. He spent many nights watching The Tonight Show on a tiny black-and-white television. He pictured himself on The Tonight Show and practiced talking with the host, Steve Allen. He would actually work on routines, as he imagined himself being a guest on the show. In his mind's picture, he was an adult appearing on the show and discussing the things he knew to be true. Even then, he visualized himself telling The Tonight Show audience that we are able to choose our own destinies. Dr. Dyer wrote "Your Erroneous Zones" while he was teaching at a university. He struggled for almost a year with the thought that he needed to go out on his own and leave the security of a bimonthly paycheck. "I had wonderful pictures in my mind's eye," he said. "I saw myself talking to everyone in America about the ideas I had just finished writing about in 'Your Erroneous Zones.' I could see in my mind that the book was going to be very successful." He left his university position and began working his plan to follow his dreams. As negative people told him that he could not accomplish his vision, he became even more committed. A year later, his book was on the New York Times best-seller list. His vision had begun to manifest! Within a few months, the book was at the top of the list, where it stayed for almost two years. Then one day, he received the "magic phone call" which was to lead to the fulfillment of the image that he had had since he was thirteen years old. He appeared on The Tonight Show three times within an eleven-day period. Visualization is not new. It has been used since the beginning of time. Aristotle said that the soul cannot think without pictures. "The reasoning mind thinks in the form of images... As the mind determines the objects it should pursue or avoid in terms of these images, even in the absence of sensation, it is stimulated to action when occupied with them." Are you visualizing your success? If so, great! If not, let's get started. As you learn more about the visualization process from different authors and/or seminars, you will see that the steps in the process can vary. Although you will want to use the process that works best for you, it's important to remember that each of the various processes focus on creating mental pictures in the present tense. The following five-step process has created success for me in business and in life. 1. Determine what you want to create in your life. What do you really want in life? What does success mean to you? What will you commit to achieving? When determining this, be sure to think of all aspects of your life. Include relationships, health, career, material wants and needs, spiritual growth, and anything else that is important to you. Make a written list of these things. Be sure to write the result of what you wish to create, not how you plan to get it. Next, review your list to make sure that it is in the present tense. When you visualize, your subconscious mind will be working in the present tense. Also, make sure that you have written what you want, not what you don't want. When you visualize, you'll need to concentrate on what you want. For example, if you are overweight, don't write that you want to lose weight. Your subconscious mind will focus on the word weight, rather than the fact that you want a thinner, healthier, more-attractive body. In this case, you might want to write, "I am physically healthy and attractive." 2. Eliminate distractions. Distractions come in two varieties: Internal and External. You can have control over both. First, you will want to eliminate the external distractions. Go to a quiet place where you will not be interrupted. The internal distractions are more difficult for most of us to eliminate, but it can be done. We all have so many things on our minds that our thoughts will tend to wander if we do not discipline our minds to stay focused on the task at hand. Close your eyes and give yourself some time to unwind. If your mind wanders onto a trivial matter and you think you must remember it, open your eyes and write it down. Then close your eyes again, stay seated, and unwind. 3. Relax your body and your mind. Most of us do not realize how much stress and tension is in our body until we start to relax. If you have a favorite way to relax, use it to relax your body before you start visualizing. If you do not have a favorite technique, you may want to try the one that works best for me. I simply tense and relax each muscle group, starting with my feet and working my way up to my forehead. Let the stress and tension leave. This has worked very well for me. 4. Create a mental movie. You are now ready to start creating your future through visualization and to put yourself on the path to realizing your vision. At this point, direct your thoughts to the image of that which you want to create in your life. Picture yourself as if you already have this in your life. The important word here is picture. Visualization works best in pictures, not paragraphs. Dennis Deaton advises visualizing these pictures as sensory-rich, emotion-laden images. He says, "The more sensory-rich and emotion-laden the images, the more powerful they are to the subconscious, the more quickly they are absorbed, and the more readily they are acted upon." In your mental movie, envision yourself using all five of your senses. 5. Reinforce your vision through consistent mental rehearsal. Your first visualization session might take some time; however, it is time well invested. Future visualization sessions might take anywhere from one to 30 minutes, depending on the circumstances. I recommend that you plan to visualize your goals and dreams at least twice each day. Through your thoughts, you are creating your life. Your mind will then drive your actions in the direction of your dominant thoughts. As human beings, not only can we dream, but also we can make our dreams come true. Eleanor Roosevelt said, "The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams." May you always believe in the beauty of your dreams! ===== Copyright (c) Lanford Inc. All rights reserved. Lanford and its successors or assigns own all right, title and interest to this publication. CYDA Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #4 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> CYDA - Control Your Destiny Through Your Attitude Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #4 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> Hi, Today's lesson will focus on... ~~~ Success Strategy #3: Set Powerful Goals Although successful people are visionaries and intentional dreamers, they are also stable and goal-oriented. As Harvey Mackay cited, "A goal is a dream with a deadline." Successful people have written goals. They communicate their goals, visualize the results, and reward themselves and others for the accomplishment of milestones. The following tips will help you to set and achieve powerful goals: 1. Before setting a goal, think about what you really want in your life. Many of us set goals to do what we think we should do; however, we do not want the results enough to remain committed to the goal. 2. Ask yourself if your goal is in alignment with your priorities in life. When a person's goals and priorities are not in alignment, a sense of being overwhelmed, or inertia, can stand in the way of accomplishing the goals. 3. Ensure that your goal is realistic and achievable. Many people give up on trying to reach their goal, because they were hoping to achieve the impossible when they set the goal. However, it is also important to engage in possibility thinking and to realize that you are capable of achieving what others might consider impossible. Give your goal some "stretch." 4. Clearly state your goal by describing your desired results exactly as you wish them to be. State the goal in terms of what will be accomplished and when it will be accomplished. 5. Ensure that your goal is measurable by asking yourself how you will know whether you have achieved this goal. 6. Write your goal on paper, and keep this piece of paper in a place where you can look at it every day. Fewer than three percent of all adults have written goals, and research shows that people with written goals are more likely to achieve them. 7. Make a commitment to yourself to reach the goal, ensuring that you understand the effort that will be involved in doing this. 8. Visualize the end result. Close your eyes, and create a mental movie of how the end result will look. In this mental movie, visualize yourself enjoying these results. Repeat this visualization daily, picturing yourself as if you have already achieved your goal. 9. Describe the benefits of your goal. Do this on paper so you can read the benefits whenever you might struggle with doing the things needed to reach the goal. 10. Establish milestones as mini-goals, and write them down as well. It is easier to work on one small step at a time than on a big goal. 11. Develop and implement an action plan. Determine the steps you will take in order to achieve your goal, and write these down. 12. Communicate your goal to supportive people who might be able to contribute to its achievement, either through direct efforts or through encouragement. 13. Reward yourself as you reach milestones along the way to achieving your goal. By giving recognition to ourselves for our accomplishments, we expand our enthusiasm and energy to accomplish more. 14. Remain flexible. Although you will set a date for accomplishing your goal, there could be an emergency situation that you need to handle en route. When taking care of this situation is a higher priority than the goal, allow yourself to adjust your schedule for accomplishing the goal. Also, as you achieve your goals, you may change direction and will, of course, set new goals for yourself. 15. If you make a mistake, give yourself permission to start again. We are all in a constant process of growth and development. We can use our mistakes as learning opportunities and become even stronger than we had been previously. Your goals, integrated with your dreams, will enhance your success, both in your business and in your personal life. ===== Copyright (c) Lanford Inc. All rights reserved. Lanford and its successors or assigns own all right, title and interest to this publication. CYDA Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #5 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> CYDA - Control Your Destiny Through Your Attitude Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #5 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> Hi, Today's lesson is... ~~~ Success Strategy #4: Determine Your Priorities Throughout much of my adult life, I considered myself one of the biggest victims of the Superwoman Syndrome. I completed two college degrees while working full-time and raising two children. This might have been enough to undertake, but I didn't stop there. It was as if I wanted to show the world and myself that I could do it all - and do it perfectly. I made great meals and kept a spotless house. After finishing the dinner dishes and putting the children to bed each evening, I would scrub the kitchen floor (on my hands and knees) before doing my schoolwork. People would comment that my basement floor was so clean that they thought they could eat off of it. Weekends were my time to catch up with the things I was not able to accomplish during the week. I often felt guilty for not doing more. One of the reasons I was able to be so productive was that I made lists of the things I needed to do. By following the lists, I didn't need to take the time to think about what to do next. I enumerated the tasks on paper as they came into my head, but I didn't spend much time prioritizing the lists. Since I thought that I had to get all of these things done, the priority didn't seem very important. I would normally start at the beginning of the list and work my way to the end. However, the lists were usually so long that I rarely got all the way to the end. The remaining items would just be transferred to the next list. One Friday evening, I made a list of the things I wanted to accomplish that weekend. One of the items on my list was to call my grandmother. She was my only living grandparent, and I loved her dearly. She was of Italian descent and one of the best cooks I had ever known. She would often call me at work to tell me that she had made spaghetti sauce and meatballs and that I should stop by after work to take this meal home with me. When I was sick, she would call every day to see how I was feeling. She cared very deeply for each of her children and grandchildren. She gave of herself and expected nothing in return. As I thought of her on this particular Friday evening, I reminded myself that I hadn't talked with her in a while. On my list, I wrote, "Call Grandma." With all of the many things on my list, I never got to this item. I had a late meeting on Monday night, so I added my item to call Grandma to my Tuesday night list. Grandma died suddenly of congestive heart failure on Tuesday. I had never made the phone call. After all of these years, I still often dream about making that call to my grandmother. I had always said that my family was my priority, but I didn't live my life that way. What a difficult lesson for me on the need to live my priorities! Because of the importance of the subject, much has been written and taught on time management, life management, and self-management. However, most people, especially high-achievers, still feel the pressures of too much to do in too little time. There are many reasons for this, one of which is the need for better prioritization. Many of us complain about interruptions in the course of the day that rob us of time we had planned to spend on the things that are important to us; however, we allow these interruptions to have power over us. We might also say that we have our priorities straight and then demonstrate otherwise through our actions. The following exercise will help you determine how you spend your time. For the next two days, keep a list of your activities in either fifteen-minute or 30-minute segments, whichever works best for you. When you are interrupted, list the nature of the interruption along with the amount of time that it took. At the end of the second day, you will see how you have spent your time and the approximate amount of time you have spent on each activity. When you have finished the time recording, prepare four sheets of paper by labeling the first "Urgent/Important," the second "Important/Not Urgent," the third "Urgent/Not Important," and the fourth "Not Urgent/Not Important." Now transfer your activities from your time recording, along with the time allocations for each, to the appropriate sheets of paper. When you have completed this, ask yourself the following questions: - Are all the items on the first sheet (Urgent/Important) really important? If not, take time now to transfer these items to the appropriate sheets. - Are all of the items on the second sheet (Important/Not Urgent) really important? If not, take time now to transfer these items to the appropriate sheets. - How much of my time am I spending on the activities that are really important to me? - If I am not spending the majority of my time on the items that are important to me, what can I change in my life in order to do this? This might involve scheduling non-interruptible time for important activities, learning to say no, delegating tasks to others, or just eliminating activities that are not that important to you. Whether or not you have clearly defined your personal mission statement, you can still determine your priorities. The following steps have worked for many successful people, and they can work for you. 1. Determine your true values. If you were asked to develop a list of your values right now, would they be your honest values, or would they be a list of values you think you should have? Keep this question in mind as you engage in this exercise. Start by making a list of items that you value most in life. 2. Prioritize your value list. At this point, your list may be quite lengthy. Since long lists make it very difficult for us to prioritize our activities, I recommend narrowing this list down to no more than your top seven values. You can start by combining the values that are similar and then determining those seven values that are indeed most important to you. Although these values are all important to you, it also helps to list them in order of most important to least important. 3. Plan and prioritize your activities. Victor Hugo said, "He who every morning plans the transaction of the day and follows out that plan, carries a thread that will guide him through the maze of the most busy life. But where no plan is laid, where the disposal of time is surrendered merely to the chance of incidence, chaos will soon reign." You might have a big project that is important but not urgent. In many cases, you will not be able to complete this project in a day. It might require several days, weeks, or even months. In this case, you can divide this project into manageable segments and develop milestones for the segments. This offers several benefits: - The project will not seem as overwhelming as it might have if you were to try to tackle it entirely at once. - It is easier to concentrate on smaller tasks. The old saying that it is "easiest to eat an elephant one bite at a time" is true. - By getting part of the project done on a daily basis, you are in a better position to complete the project on time. - You are working on something that you classify as important. 4. Make time for your highest priorities. How often have you heard someone say, "I just do not have enough time"? The truth is that they have the exact same amount of time as you and I do. The difference is in how they choose to spend or control their time and their tasks. To gain more control, it helps to ask ourselves, "Is this what I want or need to be doing right now?" If not, the prioritized action list will help you to get back on track. To create success in our lives, we need to define and prioritize our values and to live by the priorities we set for ourselves. By using the methods specified above, we are able to make time to do those things that are most important to us. When our values are prioritized before writing a "to do" list, we are better able to determine when an urgent item is an important item and act accordingly. ===== Copyright (c) Lanford Inc. All rights reserved. Lanford and its successors or assigns own all right, title and interest to this publication. CYDA Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #6 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> CYDA - Control Your Destiny Through Your Attitude Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #6 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> Hi, Today's lesson is... ~~~ Success Strategy #5: Ready! Aim! Take Action! Abraham Lincoln said, "Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle." We build a foundation by visualizing what we want, determining our priorities, and setting goals. Once this is done, it is necessary to move forward by taking action. By standing still, we move backwards in this rapidly changing world. Action is a predecessor to success. Often the most difficult part of taking action is getting started. The best way to start is to first develop an action plan. Writing an action plan requires the action of writing. Your action plan can be simple or complex, depending on the nature of your goal. Once an action plan is in place, following this plan is as easy as following a recipe. The following non-business examples will illustrate the process of developing a simple action plan: Example #1 Jane's goal is to decrease the size of clothing she wears from a 14 to a 10. Her action plan might include these steps: - Visualize myself as wearing a size 10. - Tape pictures to the refrigerator and bathroom mirror of myself from four years ago, when I wore a size 10. - Consult with my doctor concerning the diet that is best for me. - Prepare weekly menu plans. - Make grocery lists before shopping for groceries. - Shop for groceries after meals, and buy only those foods on the list. - Eat only foods that are on my diet plan. - Walk at least 20 minutes each day. - Weigh and measure myself weekly. - Reward myself with a visit to an art museum, a movie, or taking time to read a new book as I reach each five-pound milestone. Example #2 John's goal is to buy a new house. He might engage in the following action plan: - Save money for a down payment on the new house. - Study information about local communities and determine where I want to live. - Visualize my new home. - List the features that I want in my new home. - Interview real estate agents, and select the one who will work best with me. - With the selected real estate agent, tour homes that are in my selected area, which have the features I want and are within my price range. - Revisit the homes that best match my selection criteria. - Make an offer to purchase the house. - Celebrate, and move in! Although most action plans associated with your business goals will be longer and more complex than these examples, the process will be the same. The action plans have the following similarities: - The steps are listed in sequential order, even though some of them are ongoing or overlapping during the process. - Each step is measurable, i.e., you will know when the step has been completed. - The action plans do require visualization of the end result. Now that we have covered the first five success strategies, it's important to know that these strategies gain a lot of power when they are integrated. In other words, if your beliefs, visions, priorities, goals, and actions are synchronized, you will be able to create much more success in your life. Sigmund Freud once said, "Thought is action in rehearsal." I encourage you to rehearse your actions through thought, to develop action plans to achieve your major goals, and then to follow your plans. ===== Copyright (c) Lanford Inc. All rights reserved. Lanford and its successors or assigns own all right, title and interest to this publication. CYDA Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #7 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> CYDA - Control Your Destiny Through Your Attitude Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #7 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> Hi, Here's today's lesson... ~~~ Success Strategy #6: Stay Focused. Success requires concentration and focus on our vision, priorities, and goals. However, ours is a time of shrinking concentration spans and less focus. Why are people focusing less now than before? I asked a cross-section of business people what they thought. Following are some of their answers regarding their opinions of reasons for less concentration and shorter attention spans: - There are so many communication devices that interrupt a person's time. We have cell phones, pagers, call waiting, Internet instant messages, etc. - We are constantly rushing from one activity to another, without a moment in between. This does not allow for periods of exploration in the woods, fishing, taking a walk, or just concentration. - In our hurry-up world of fragmented communications, we have become accustomed to multi-tasking. - The invention of the television remote control has enabled us to shorten our attention span. Since we live in a fast-paced, hurry-up world, multi-tasking and getting things done fast are necessities of life. However, when we are working on a major goal, we need to set aside time just to focus on that goal. Alexander Hamilton once said, "Men give me credit for genius. All the genius I have lies in this: When I have a subject in hand, I study it profoundly. Day and night, it is before me. I explore it in all its bearings. My mind becomes pervaded with it. Then... people are pleased to call [the effort that I made] the fruit of genius. It is the fruit of labor and thought." To this statement, I add that it is also the fruit of focus. In today's complicated world, multiple distractions vie for our attention at any given time. The way in which we deal with these distractions determines how well we are able to focus on our goals and priorities. If you will take the time during the next 24 hours to observe how you handle distractions, you might have some surprises. During this time period, write each distraction as it occurs. After recording a distraction on paper, write a comment on how you handled this distraction. At the end of the 24 hours, review your notes, observe any patterns that may exist, congratulate yourself for the times that you handled the distraction well, and determine where you can make some improvements. Following are some methods that successful people use to handle distractions: - Set aside quiet time during the day to focus on your top priorities or action steps. During these quiet times, stay away from the telephone and other sources of interruption, allowing interruptions for emergencies only. - Decrease the stress in your body and your mind before you start focusing on a priority or action step. - Keep a piece of paper and a pen at hand while you are focusing on a project or task. When an unrelated thought enters your mind, write it down. These thoughts can be reviewed at a later time. - Periodically during the next month, repeat the exercise of recording your distractions and the methods that you use to deal with them. Note the progress that you are making in this area. Before the 1993 Superbowl, Dallas Cowboys coach Jimmy Johnson gave his team a pep talk. He told them that, if he laid a two-by-four plank on the floor, each of them would walk across it and not fall. The reason for this would be that their focus would be on walking the plank. "But if I put the same two-by-four ten stories high between two buildings," said Johnson, "only a few would make it." This would be because the focus would be on falling. He told his team not to focus on the crowd, the media, or the possibility of losing. Instead, they were to focus on each play of the game, just as if it were a good practice session. The Dallas Cowboys won the game 52 to 17. If we focus on winning, we will win. If we focus on accomplishing our goals, we will accomplish our goals. If we focus on success, we will be successful. The key is to focus. ===== Copyright (c) Lanford Inc. All rights reserved. Lanford and its successors or assigns own all right, title and interest to this publication. CYDA Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #8 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> CYDA - Control Your Destiny Through Your Attitude Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #8 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> Hi, Success Strategy #7 is about how to control your destiny through your attitude, which we've covered in great detail in the ebook. So, we'll move on to today's lesson... ~~~ Success Strategy #8: Live Your Life with Integrity When I was in my early thirties, I decided to take up the game of golf. During my first year on the golf course, my scores were sometimes almost twice as high as those of some of my playing partners. Since I was the ultimate perfectionist, this was extremely embarrassing to me. As we called out our scores after each hole, I would be tempted to lower my score by one or two points so that it would not sound quite as bad as it was. A tempting voice inside of me would say, "Make up a number. They probably can't count that high anyway." I would think about it and finally answer the voice, saying, "But I would know it, and I am the one who has to live with myself." What does integrity mean to you? In the case of my golf score, I considered integrity to be an honesty issue. Although honesty contributes to integrity, there are more aspects to integrity than just telling the truth. Integrity is unique for each of us. As you are thinking about your level of integrity, ask yourself the following questions: - Do I tell the truth? - Is my word my bond? - Do my promises have value? - Do I do what I say I am going to do? - Am I committed to commitment? Integrity is the result of having the following three conditions in one's life: - Resolution of all important matters. This includes the correction of any wrongs, making any personal changes necessary to ensure one's life works well, and fully handling every task and job that one decides to do. - Alignment and balance in life. Alignment, in this case, means that our goals are aligned with our values and priorities, our actions are based on what is true for us, and our commitments are aligned with our vision or purpose in life. - Responsibility. In speaking about integrity, the word "responsibility" means being responsible for that which occurs in one's life. This includes handling whatever happens and making necessary adjustments to prevent this type of problem in the future. Responsible people do not blame, complain, or point fingers at other people. They just handle the situation. The following exercise will help you to work on and increase your personal integrity: 1. Make a list of the ways that your life is currently "in integrity." Pat yourself on the back, as you are on your way to success as you strengthen your personal integrity. 2. Make a list of the ways that you are not now "in integrity." In addition to thinking about honesty, ask yourself questions like the following: - Do I pay my bills on time? - Do I do what I say I will do? (For example, if you tell someone you will call him or her, do you make that call?) - Do I meet my time commitments? - Am I working at the right job for me? - Am I associating with people who are uplifting and positive? 3. Analyze the source of each item on your list from number 2. If these items are important to you, be sure to resolve all of them before moving to the next step. You might start by listing the consequences that result from each of them. Then write the changes you would need to make in order to eliminate the consequences and bring integrity to these parts of your life. 4. Make a commitment to start living a life of integrity, as you define it. Your integrity is unique to you, and you are the one who will decide what it means for you. You need to commit to commitment. 5. Let go of at least ten "shoulds," "coulds," "oughts," and "wills." In doing this, realize that it is impossible to be all things to all people. 6. Involve a coach or another strong person to help you. Find an individual who is interested in partnering with you to help you to improve your personal integrity. This should be someone who truly cares about your well-being, wants the best for you, and is willing to tell you the truth. 7. Stop spending time with people who are not the best role models. You know who these people are. Concentrate on spending your time with those people who are uplifting and from whom you receive the gift of positive energy. 8. Develop a realistic action plan for improving your personal integrity. Keep this action plan simple. Include elements that you can actually do, rather than things that might occur. Once you have developed this plan, add it to your priority list, your goals, and the overall action plan you developed earlier in this e-course. Personal integrity is a personal choice. The benefits of living in integrity are numerous. As people increase their level of integrity, they begin to become aware of the following in their life: - More energy. - An effortlessness feeling about achieving the results they want. - Much less stress. - The attraction of more fulfilling people who are consistently reliable, empowering, loving, and inspiring. - A richer and more successful life. In Golden Nuggets, Sir John Templeton says, "Probably the greatest secret to peace of mind is living the life of personal integrity - not what people think of you, but what you know of yourself. If you remain true to your ethical principles, your personal integrity can become an attractive beacon for success on every level. Listen carefully to the inner promptings of conscience and live peacefully." Personal integrity is of utmost importance to success. It is your personal foundation on which you can build the person you want to be. ===== Copyright (c) Lanford Inc. All rights reserved. Lanford and its successors or assigns own all right, title and interest to this publication. CYDA Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #9 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> CYDA - Control Your Destiny Through Your Attitude Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #9 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> Hi, Here's today's lesson... ~~~ Success Strategy #9: Take Time to Enjoy Your Life It is so easy to become absorbed in one part of life and to become out of balance. We are meant to enjoy life. When we allow ourselves to be out of balance, we become more stressed. As a result, we enjoy life less. This limits our success. Stopping to "smell the roses" is more than a cliche. It points out the importance of appreciating beauty, human relationships, and the things that are most important to us. It offers the opportunity to reflect, to decrease stress, and to add balance to our lives. This not only contributes to, but also enhances any success we may achieve. When I received the job offer for my 3M European assignment, both my husband, Cliff, and I were excited about the opportunity ahead of us. I developed goals and objectives for the European job long before we left the United States. I wanted to make sure my accomplishments were significant for the two years that I would be there and didn't give much thought to the wonderful adventures that would be available. After I had been in Europe for two weeks, I sent a status report to my United Sates human resource manager through electronic mail. I will always cherish his response. He started by complimenting me on what I had already accomplished in the two weeks that I had been in Europe. He then added some advice by saying, "You will be given a lot of vacation time while you are on your European assignment. Be sure you take this time, and make it a point to see as much of Europe as you can. There are too many people who return from foreign assignments, never having taken advantage of the opportunity to explore the areas where they have lived. Many will remark, 'I worked so hard that I missed the party.' Enjoy the party while you are there." I am grateful that this advice came very early during my European assignment. It allowed me to rethink my priorities and make the adjustments necessary to "enjoy the party" while still making the significant impact that I had planned. In fact, I think the reason I was able to exceed my job objectives was due in part to the enjoyment of the adventures I experienced. Since Cliff was retired, he was able to travel with me on many of my business trips. I would plan meetings in London for Fridays and Mondays, so we would be there for the weekend to spend time with friends, visit museums, and go to the theater. When we weren't in London or sightseeing in France, we would take short weekend trips to Germany, the Netherlands, and Belgium. We cruised the Mediterranean and Black Seas and took vacations in Italy, Spain, and Portugal. We also entertained many friends who visited us in France, and we enjoyed every minute of it. The added bonus was that I was able to exceed my objectives for the job assignment and to enjoy that even more than I had anticipated. Are you taking time to enjoy the moment and bring pleasure into your life? You might start by answering the following questions: - Do I regularly take time for myself? - Do I enjoy the company of special people? - Do I enjoy the social events I attend? - Do I live my priorities? - Is my work challenging and fulfilling? - Do I engage in recreational activities? - Do I have at least one hobby? - Do I take care of my health and have regular checkups? - Do I exercise regularly? - Do I give to others? - Am I a grateful receiver? - Do I have a way to relax that eliminates stress? - Do I feel energized at the end of most work days? If you have answered "yes" to all of these questions, congratulations! Otherwise, the following suggestions may be of help: 1. Be in the present. A colleague once said, "Being fully in the present is a gift. It is a gift to yourself as well as to others. You literally create your future with your thoughts and actions. When you are fully in the present, you are totally involved and alert to opportunities. The people you encounter subjectively sense whether or not you are fully with them. This has a great impact on the quality of your personal and business relationships." 2. Enjoy your work. Are you working at a job that you love? If not, is there any possibility you can make a change? A change does not necessarily mean a totally different job. It could mean adding or subtracting something from your current job in order to make it more enjoyable. 3. Take time for yourself. Do you take time for yourself? When is the last time you went for a walk in the park and enjoyed nature? Enjoyed a bubble bath? Had lunch with a friend? Read a book? If you had an entire day to do something spontaneous, what would it be? Why not do it now? 4. Give to others. Have you ever noticed how good you feel when you give to someone else? Some people wait to give until they can afford to buy an extravagant gift. This is not necessary, as it is usually the non-material gifts that the receiver values most. This can be as simple as a smile or a compliment. It can be the simple gift of showing someone that you care by giving him or her your attention. It can be taking the time to tell someone that you appreciate him or her. Although these gifts do not cost anything, they can be the most precious to both the receiver and the giver. 5. Engage in recreational activities. The word "recreation" contains the root word create, which means "to cause to exist." By preceding this word with the prefix re, which means "again" or "anew," we are saying that we are causing a new existence of ourselves. We are refreshing our lives, both mentally and physically. 6. Express and feel gratitude. Part of expressing gratitude is becoming a gracious receiver. Many people think they should always be the giver, rather than the receiver; hence they have difficulty in accepting that which is given to them. Many have told me that they think they are not worthy or deserving. It is important to gratefully receive all the gifts that life has to offer us. These gifts include gifts of nature, such as sunlight, the sounds of singing birds, spring showers, and the beauty of the first snow of winter. They also include gifts from others, both material and non-material. Seize the joy of the day, savor each moment as special, and appreciate the beauty of life! ===== Copyright (c) Lanford Inc. All rights reserved. Lanford and its successors or assigns own all right, title and interest to this publication. CYDA Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #10 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> CYDA - Control Your Destiny Through Your Attitude Follow-up e-Course -- Lesson #10 <>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<> Hi, Here's the final lesson of this e-course... ~~~ Success Strategy #10: Continue to Learn Most of my book interviewees have college degrees; however, even those who have not pursued a formal education have engaged in a lifelong learning program. They know that continuous learning contributes to success, both in their career and in life. It is easy to procrastinate the development of a learning plan, especially for those who are living a hurry-up lifestyle. However, no matter how hectic your life is, you will become more successful if you make time to continue your learning. Following are some of the options for incorporating learning into your life: 1. Obtain a formal education. In addition to being an excellent opportunity to learn, formal education opens doors. If your work experience is limited, a formal education is a way to let prospective employers and clients know that you can persevere, meet objectives, and succeed. 2. Attend seminars and workshops. Each day, thousands of seminars, workshops, and conferences are offered in various locations throughout the United States. Many of these are related to particular professions, and others provide personal growth and development. Some of them are free of charge, such as workshops offered by some church groups and non-profit organizations. Be selective when determining which seminars, workshops, and conferences to attend. Because of the number of these types of learning opportunities available, make sure the ones you attend are the ones that will be the most beneficial, either professionally or personally. 3. Read books, magazines, newspapers, and information available on the Internet. A wealth of information on a myriad of subjects is available in print and via the Internet. One of the great things about learning from these sources is that you can engage in this type of learning from almost any place, including in the comfort of your own home. My advice in selecting reading material is the same as that for selecting conferences and workshops. Because of the quantity of books, magazines, and newspapers available, we need to be selective. This applies to the reading we do for enjoyment, as well as the reading that we do in order to learn. It is unrealistic and counterproductive to attempt to read everything that comes into our homes or offices. Attempting to do so becomes overwhelming and can cause one to neglect priorities. 4. Enhance your listening skills. Listening to the spoken word is another way we can learn. By listening to that which is happening around us, we learn so much more than we do when we are speaking. For example, a mother learns to identify her baby's needs by listening to his different cries. A child learns to stay away from danger by listening to his or her mother's warnings. A factory worker learns to perform her job responsibilities by listening to her foreperson's instructions. We all learn by listening to those who know more about a subject than we do. By spending more time listening and less time talking, we create learning opportunities that will increase our effectiveness and, ultimately, our success. 5. Listen to audiotapes. We are living in a time of convenience with the many classes, seminars, and books that are available on audiotape. If you have a tape or CD player in your car, you are able to make your driving time more productive by listening to tapes and CDs. An alternative to purchasing audiotapes is to check them out at the local library or exchange tapes with others. If your only venue for listening to audiotapes is your car, it is advisable to listen to the tapes several times to maximize your learning opportunity. Some speakers recommend that you listen to a tape five or six times. Certainly, if you listen to a tape for the first time while driving, you might want to also make time available to listen to it a second time when you can give it your full attention and take notes. You can then use these notes as you develop your learning plan. 6. Learn from life's experiences. When my daughter was a teenager, I felt that I was constantly protecting and correcting her. When I realized that she resented this, I told her that I had made many mistakes in my life and that I would like to help her to learn from my mistakes. I thought this would protect her from experiencing some of the pain I had felt as a result of these mistakes. Her answer surprised me when she said, "Mom, don't you think I will learn more from my own mistakes than I will learn from yours?" As much as I disliked the idea of my child experiencing pain, I realized she was right. We can learn from the experiences of others, but we learn even more from our own experiences, both positive and negative. 7. Challenge yourself with new experiences. Each of us has the opportunity to learn by challenging ourselves with new experiences. Start by making a list of areas in your life that you want to strengthen. From this, you can do some brainstorming regarding the things you might do in order to develop the new strength you desire. 8. Work with a personal and/or professional coach or mentor. There are thousands of professional coaches available to assist individuals in learning how to create success in their lives. People hire coaches for many reasons, including the following: - To set better goals. - To reach their goals faster. - To make significant changes. - To make better decisions. - To make a bigger impact on the world. - To increase income or revenues. - To become a better businessperson. A coach or a mentor can be a valuable asset to you as you develop your learning plan and take action to create success in your life. 9. Develop a personal learning plan. Do you have a personal learning plan? If not, you are not alone, as most people do not take the time to develop such plans. As a result, many people participate in learning activities that do not align with their top priorities and goals. A personal learning plan need not be elaborate; nor does it need to take a long time to develop. Start by reviewing your priorities and goals and determining what it is that you need to know in order to achieve what you want in life. From there, you can decide the best methods for learning that which you need and/or want to know. Continuous, lifelong learning is important to success. Albert Einstein once said, "Education is that which remains when one has forgotten everything he learned in school." That which you learn throughout life contributes to your education and to your success. Best wishes to you for continuing success as you integrate these ten strategies into your life! ===== Copyright (c) Lanford Inc. All rights reserved. Lanford and its successors or assigns own all right, title and interest to this publication.